Allowing Creativity Amongst the Genius

Our oldest has always been the one with the incredible test scores, massive memory, super smart----we've always assumed he wanted to be a scientist when he grew up. I think this is what he even told us a few times. But recently he came home and surprised us.

At school they were having a discussion on hope. They wanted the students to tell what their dreams and hopes were, and how they would be able to reach their goal. He came home with a picture of a tree that showed the roots. He said the roots were who helped support him and then on the leaves was what his goal was.

Now, what do you suppose was on this tree? No, no scientists, world leaders, doctors, computer professionals, teachers, etc. Nope. His was "I want to be a Professional Dancer." Yep.

So, I showed this to my husband who of course freaked out, silly him! I pulled him outside while he proceeded to panic and ask what we could do to defer him from thinking this is what he wanted in life. Now, it's not what you're thinking. My husband has been very accepting of our oldest's love of dance and hatred of sports. It is not because he doesn't like it, but there were 2 concerns he had:

1-"How can he do that? He is still so awkward and a little uncoordinated, he's like me! Look at me! I'm a clutz! How can he be a professional dancer?"

and

2-"He's so smart. Why would he want to go into dancing when his mind is so genius? Wouldn't he want to use that?"

OK, now before we start getting ugly ugly comments on this blog post, I want you all to calm down. And yes, I told my husband to calm down, and good grief---our son is only 9! He is 9 years old, and if he wants to be a professional dancer, then let him have that dream! He is 9! And, how do you know he isn't going to get better at dance, or maybe his coordination will improve? He's only been dancing for a year. He's just started! You can't expect Billy Elliot in one year's time.

And, yes, he is super smart, but would going into a career in dance ruin that? Would it make his mind a waste? I don't believe that.

But here's to say---what happens to those kids that parents only let them focus on the academic and never allow them to experience the arts or music? If anything, I believe giving them a chance to develop their creativity through art, dance, or music gives them more and builds them up more as a person and allows them to be more developed and smart later.

Our oldest didn't just take up dance naturally like our second son and the piano, but that doesn't mean anything. Yes, some people have a natural gift for different things, and maybe dance isn't that, but he's doing well, and he enjoys it, and if he wants to work hard enough, then I believe he can do anything he wants to in life.

Maybe it won't pan out, and maybe he won't be that good to go professional, but as a parent, I'm going to be there to support him as long as he wants. But at the same time, we will also encourage his increasing knowledge and schooling in the academic fields as well. He can go either way. Who is to know what he'll want to do 10 years from now? I'm sure there are lots of parents out there who didn't freak out when their child told them they wanted to be "cowboys" or "race car drivers" when they grew up.

And just so you know, I like cowboys, and I think it would be awesome to be a race car driver too.

The Birds and the Bees

One problem of having a gifted child is their excessive need for reading everything. We have gotten them all sorts of books, but the ones they seem to want to read the most are the science books. In particular, our oldest likes to read nonfiction books, science books, or I've even caught him reading the dictionary. To me these are some of the most boring books, but he can't get enough.

We have volumes of science books and old childcraft books that are somewhat like an encyclopedia, and I'm sure he has read all 16 volumes beginning to end.

Now, we don't have anything that is of questionable material around our house, and we don't have any books that are inappropriate for children, but one day I was a bit worried.

We have pretty high standards in our house and somehow we were having an innocent discussion about what rules we have toward dating when you get older and how we are supposed to get married before you live with someone, and how we are supposed to be married before we have kids. Then out of the blue our oldest says something toward the extent of "I know because then the sperm fertilizes the egg to make a baby".

This was right before he was being dropped off at school, and since I was so shocked that a nine year old would even know these words, I didn't say anything and just waved him goodbye. After he was gone I frantically called up my husband and demanded to know what he could possibly know to which my husband said "huh?".

Later that night I pulled my oldest aside and asked him what exactly he knew about this sperm and egg thing he had told me about earlier. He then began this exact text book definition/explanation that you might find in a high school health class book about the human reproduction.

I asked him where he learned this, if he read it, or someone told him. He said he read it in one of his science books about the human body. I assumed he had read it being that he can pretty much retell word for word anything he has read. He has this kind of incredible reciprocating memory. Anyway, I asked him if he knew how this science explanation all happened, and he said not really, and I took it like he didn't really care.

So, that was that. No, I don't think we'll get into that discussion just yet. Nine years old is a bit young for me I think. He didn't ask me any questions and it's OK. I'm a bit relieved, but it's so true that he knows so much. Sometimes it scares me how much he reads and all he knows. Hopefully I'll be ready when the real talk time comes. I think I'll direct him to his father then.